"The only thing that stands between a man and what he wants
from life is often merely the will to try it and the faith to believe that it
is possible." ~ Richard M. DeVos
Making a conscious change or life decision is accessible to you at any given
minute. As you read this article, take relax,
reflect, and choose
to let go of the wheel that is controlling your life. Release your tight grip and focus your energy
towards your breathing and the rise and fall of your chest. Use this time to resonate with your life dreams,
hopes, and beliefs; remember you are here for a divine purpose. Whatever your
purpose may be... there is reason. Your
life is a gift, believe and trust in that purpose, not only for yourself, but
for all others around you. There are many people lost in faith and searching
for that same goal... peace of mind. What do you believe in? What is your
purpose in this life? Do you still have faith or have you lost it? Are you
living your life by grazing the surface or are you digging deeper?
Trusting faith and letting go of the wheel is a title filled with inspiration,
motivation, and spirit. By implementing
trust and belief, you can learn what true faith is in your life. But first, you
have to accept and commit to a higher calling.
For many people, committing to a higher power is a difficult concept,
because where there should be faith, there is doubt and desolate
confusion. Within the chaos, they often tend to follow a
misleading path... a path of doubt that leads to dead-end journeys. Some people are living a life of negative
based words, i.g. “despair, anger, fear, sloth, anxiety, selfishness, manipulation,
domination, obsessive behavior” that leads to nowhere. Control in a negative environment is
codependency at its worst. Controlling
people fear abandonment and therefore, they try to control the people they are
dependent on. They want to have power
and are often referred by others as, "Being on a power trip." Faith is a positive word... an assumption; it
is a confidence or belief with a strong conviction for which there may be no
concrete proof. Faith is simply the opposite of fear and doubt. Faith is often
used as a substitute for hope, trust, or belief, but in all essence those three
words are intricate ingredients in the recipe for faith. Prayer is another crucial ingredient in living
your life in faith. You can choose to
live a misleading path or you can choose to change your life for the betterment
of yourself and those around you.
Your mind, heart, hands,
and body wants to be dictating how everything should be done. Are you a perfectionist and like to have
everything a certain way? Perfection can
be misleading, as well. Do you ever tell
people, "I just like to have things a certain way," "I'm a
control freak," or "It's my way or the highway"? Are there people in your life you are trying
to control? Do you waste valuable energy
on business that doesn’t concern you?
Let it go! You are deflating your
own spirit by controlling everything around you. Are you mentally and physically exhausted? Are you overwhelmed? We tend to want control every aspect of our
lives, including the steering wheel of our car.
Belted in the driver’s seat, we taxi ourselves or our children through
one busy day after another. We have responsibilities with work, family, kids, finance,
health, relationships; and it's habit to want control of every aspect of those
responsibilities (because we're always in the driver's seat), right? But, if
you look up the word responsibility, you'll find the word "control"
somewhere close by, and this is where all the confusion begins. The more we
demand to have the control over our responsibilities and want the power over
every situation, the more out of control our lives become. One of the reasons
people tend to lose faith (hope, trust, belief) is because they don't get their
desired result in a situation. Then, a year later, they learn that what they
were trying to control was never meant to be after all! If only they would have had faith in that
situation and time to let go of the wheel!
Do not lose faith when things get chaotic, that's when you should have
more faith, because you are supposed to learn something from that experience. And, it is your choice as to how you will
handle it. Will you let it go or will
you try to get your way instead of His way?
How many times have you
tried to control the outcome of a situation in your life? Do you panic and
forget to think straight? Do you act and
make impulsive decisions based on fear, anger, or depression? If so, then there's a place where you can
rest- a place where there is peace, a place where you are no longer the
driver... but the passenger. The wheel is still there, but this time you can
say, "I'd like to go left" or "I'd like to go right." It is
trusting that no matter which way your car turns, it will be for an outcome of
greater service in your life and trusting that you don't have to have the
hassle and worry of being in control.
In reality, I like to drive
my own vehicle... rarely will you find me in the passenger seat. To this day, the reason is fear based
experiences. I grew up with an abusive,
alcoholic step-father and alcoholic mother.
Much of their time was spent down at different local bars for hours and many
times, I as a child, would have to go with them. Very rarely, did the evening ever end without
an argument between them. Intoxicated
and fighting they would exit the bar and I knew it would be a terrifying ride
home. I knew what was going to
happen. The beatings happened almost
every night. I always believed that one
day my mother would be beaten to death and I always feared, "Would this be
the night?". My gargantuan,
red-faced step-father, would get behind the wheel of our family van and before
he even put the keys in the ignition, I knew (as I sat in the back seat), I had
absolutely no control over my destiny. The only thing I did have was prayer.
Within seconds, as the tire wheels began to turn, so did my fearful mind. How
can I control this situation? How can I get out? So many factors were against
me (let alone my mean, annihilated, and controlling step-father and drunk
mother). I believed wouldn't see the
light of another day. The first factor against me was in the 1970's, we weren't
required to wear seatbelts. Second, we were miles from home and I couldn't bail
out of a moving van. Thirdly, if I said one word, the beatings would also be
directed by him upon me. I was an only
child who always fended for myself and spent the majority of my time in my room
alone. I lost faith in praying and I
lost faith in my higher power. I felt
alone without guidance and lost in a violent world.
But, back to the speeding
van... I don't have enough fingers or toes to count the many times I feared for
my life on the rides home. My step-dad would swerve
back and forth, cross into the opposite lane, slam on the brakes, intentionally
drive erratically, and even drive off
the road down into the ditch. My
step-father would yell at the top of his lungs, bully, grab, and threaten my
mother taking his eyes off the road to focus on her. I witnessed this craziness, selfishness,
insanity, and senseless behavior time and time again. I was deathly afraid and hung on for dear
life. I prayed, "God, please just get us home safe. God, please just make
him stop swerving. God... oh God, please help me." But on and on the
fighting went and so did the out-of-control van. My step-abuser would threaten
to beat the daylights out of my mom if she didn't shut the "blank"
up! I'd pray again for her not to say
another word... but she always did. Check! Another prayer not answered (I'd
think in my mind). Fragmented flashes of highway signs, ditches, yellow
stripes, trees, gravel going everywhere, and prayers not answered are cemented
in my mind. I can still see my step-abuser's one hand on the steering wheel,
while the other arm reached out to pummel my mother with punches. He'd let go
of the wheel and I would grab it and steer just to keep us from going into the
ditch. Many times, he'd slam his foot on the brake pedal as a warning, but then
in a flash, the van would stop, and he was yanking her out of the van to hit
her. The beatings finally stopped some
years ago when he met his own demise in a local hospital due to natural
causes. My mother continues to drink and
is in another abusive relationship. Like
I said earlier, people have choices as to how they will live their lives. It's not about control, it's about making the
right choices and letting go of past pains, regrets, mistakes, and learning to
forgive. You can choose to live a
miserable life or you can choose to let it go.
No one can do it for you.
Through the years I thought,
"If I don't have control over my own life... who will? If I want to be something, have things, or be
safe, I have to control every aspect of my life." I used to believe in my 20's, that faith and
prayer didn't help me much when I was a child and teenager, so why should I start
believing or having hope now? Well,
needless to say, things didn't go well in my 20's under my control either... in
fact, they got worse. So again, I asked myself, "Why start having faith
now?" Well, actually the answer was
simple... I discovered over much soul-searching, that the one thing I could
control was my desire to have a good life. I didn't want to live my life unhappy and in
dysfunction like I did in my past. I decided
to have faith in a better existence. I knew
that I wanted to make a positive difference in my lifetime, so I chose to believe that something greater
than myself could help me do that. And, that I wouldn't let Him down. You have a CHOICE. Our higher power is always presenting us with
choices and options, but it is ultimately your control as to which choice you
will make in this life. I chose to have
faith. I chose to be a positive
difference in someone else's life. I've
seen the alternative of not having faith flash before my eyes many times. How I'm even alive today... I can't even tell
you. All I know is that faith is for a
greater purpose and that's why I choose to let go of the wheel in my own life. It's a humongous weight off your shoulders
when you can turn all of your worrying energy over to something greater than
yourself and say, "I give You the wheel to my life. I give it all to you.
I trust you and know that my life is in your hands now. Take it all! All my worries, all my fears, all my hopes and
all my dreams. I have faith that You
will guide me in the right direction." That's when it actually feels amazing to sit
in the passenger seat!! And honestly,
it's the only time I feel totally at ease to sit in the passenger seat. Sure, I'm only human and sometimes I have to
give myself a pinch to remind myself to snap and think, "Wait a minute,
I'm trying to control this situation." I trust my Higher Power to look out
for my best interests and safety. It's
comforting to know that there is someone I trust who has my back and my
well-being at heart. To this day, I have
issues with my mother not making the right choices in her life. But, I cannot control her life. As painful as it is, I have to let it
go. I choose to live my life on a
different path and dysfunction is not a part of my hopes and beliefs. Dysfunction only brings misery and a dismal shortened
existence. Faith brings hope and joy for
eternity.
Can you recall as a kid how
good it felt when you rode your bike and you let go of the handle bars? Back in the 70's, we used to call it riding
"free-hand." Sure, it was
scary at first, but eventually you did it because you wanted to know what it
felt like to not use your hands. Remember
how freeing it felt to extend your arms out to your sides while the bike
steered itself (with of course, a little balance on your part). So, as you extend your arms out in faith, feel
that same freedom~ let go of your worries, anxiety, fear, and cares~ turn them
over to a Higher Power. Have you ever
seen people in church reach out and extend their arms? They are turning over control to a power
greater than themselves. They are
honoring their Higher Power and what they can no longer do for themselves. When you release your power, mean it. Let go of the wheel that is steering your life.
Remember those dark times in your life
when you may have crumbled to the ground and said, "I can't do this no
more... I surrender." That is true
freedom. “Cast your cares on the LORD
and he will sustain you; he will never let the righteous fall” (Psalm 55:22). “Cast all your anxiety on him because he cares
for you” (1 Peter 5:7). Remember, life
is not about control, it's about trusting and believing to let go of the wheel. LET IT GO!
"I can do all things through Christ
who strengthens me." - Philippians 4:13
